These are the stages of my life where contentment has no room...
In my gradeshool years, our housemaid usually prepares my lunchbox, there she puts my favorite snacks, you cam find there egg pie with sunkist juice or chocolaite. When my granny sent packages, our housemaid prepares Lipton Iced Tea at night and put it in the fridge so that it will be cold at the following day. When I am sick and tired of my usual "baon", I'll just trade my food to a classmate who just bought a junk food for her snacks.
When I got older, I usually pack my lunch too. Our housemaid will prepare breakfast and includes somrthing for my lunch. My viand varies everyday because I'll freak out when I'll found out that she prepared something that I had the same week. So for me not to have tantrums, she prepares different food everyday. Without her knowledge, there are times when I really don't eat the food she prepared. Sometimes, it's either thrown in the bin or I'll just give it to a classmate who has no "baon".
In my high school years, contentment is really not on my vocabulary. I always seek for something else. There were times when I always want something new. In fact, I could trade my "forever 21" blouse or my DKNY shirt for a cheaper one just to have something new. There were also time when I traded my "sinigang" for "monggo" for my lunch.
On my College years, my mom and dad sent me too a private university. There I couldn't still find my happiness,I an not contented with everything I have. For the record, I enrolled BS-Nursing and yet, nothing was changed, I was not happy at all. To my foolishness, I just played around, i wasted time, money and everybody's sacrifices.
That is the reason why my mom and dad sent me to state university because for them, I am not worth spending anymore. When I am in the said university already, still my contentment is lacking. My latter years are the worst. There were times when I'd rather sleep over to a friend's house thn to stay to my supposedly most comfortable place in the world--our home.
The worst things about these stupid things is that for so many times, I can't admit the fact that friends may leace you but not your family.
This morning, I've realized that I should stop seeking my happiness to anybody or anything because my happiness is really not gone. I came to realize that I have everything that a child or a person could ever wish for. Nutritious foods, comfortable shelter, best education, loving family and friends.
It is stupid to think that happiness is gone, because happiness is in YOU. And happiness can never be taken by anyone as long as you won't allow them to do so by not embracing every little thing that you have.
For happiness-seeker like me before, stop doing so, it's unhealthy at all. It is not worthwhile to do so. It will not make any sense...Find your happiness within you...
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